Ask Jenn – March 9, 2020

Hi Jenn,
Quick question. I love milfs and cougars and I feel like I might be too big for girls my age (26). Is that an actual problem?

Average erect penis size is 3-9 inches. So unless you have an erect dick that is a size outlier—bigger than 9 inches, it’s unlikely you’ll have problems. Vaginas change over a woman’s life, and there are a variety of factors that can impact those changes. Age, birth, menstrual cycle, and hormonal levels all play a role, but the most important thing to remember is that those factors vary so individually that it’s impossible to make generalizations about what a woman’s vagina will be like based on age or experience.

Well, you definitely fall within the average range. The thing to remember is that just as penis’s come in different sizes, so do vaginas. Typically, if she is properly aroused—she’s turned on and lubricated, most men and women should be able to fit together. Age or experience has nothing to do with it.

As for girth vs length, that is such an individual preference that it’s impossible to answer. Girthier dicks can feel fuller to some women, yes, while others prefer length. And it’s possible to be too girthy, just like it’s possible to be too long. It all depends on how two people fit together.

It sounds like you have been able to penetrate your female partners, it’s just that you can’t always get as rough as you’d like. Here’s a few tips that could help.

1) Recognize that the female sexual cycle impacts her body. During her fertile days, the cervix moves up. During this time, due to those and other changes inside her vagina, it might be easier for her to enjoy rough sex. So if it doesn’t work the first time, don’t give up. You could just be in a time in her cycle where rough sex just doesn’t work or feel good for her.

2) Position is key. If you are entering her from behind, for example, this hits her G-spot and can feel very deep and intense, so if you are large, this isn’t the best for rough sex. You might want to try missionary instead, or a position where her legs are closed slightly, so that you have to push against her harder, but she has some control over how deep you go.

3) Give lube a try. This can really help to keep things extra wet and slippery so that you don’t chafe her and can help her relax and loosen a bit more.

4) Communication. Sounds like you are attentive to your partner’s needs, wants, and pleasure, which is great. Keep this up by asking her if she likes rough sex and if she does, what positions work best for her. Keep checking-in in the moment and remember, that just because something doesn’t work once doesn’t mean it will never work.

Good luck!